What is a black porn breakfast? If you check out the soon to open restaurant in Europe, you’d discover that it’s a large blackened sausage with two eggs. That is the type of food one could expect when walking into the Porn Table.
The Porn Table is the brain child of two retired porn stars who had settled down in Europe. Being able to save enough money, the couple had decided to put up a business that they believe would be beneficial and fun. Jack Spurts and Dinah Deepthroat came up with the idea of a porn themed restaurant after dining out at a famous Hollywood themed restaurant and found it tacky. “There is nothing long lasting about the novelty of film props” said Spurts. “Porn memorabilia is much more fun.”
The restaurant will feature several larger than life posters of their favorite porn stars, as well as memorabilia from their favorite porn movies. The staff will be decked out in fan favorite porn costumes, from school girl outfits to latex BDSM get ups. The food is of top notch quality, and the menu will not surprisingly center around meat products. Aside from the black porn breakfast, customers can also expect various steaks and burgers with a naughty twist.
The dishes were Deepthroat’s idea, who always had a knack for cooking and grilling. “My latest creation is the Bukkake Burger. It’s this thick, double patty burger slathered in white cream. My husband says it looks kinda weird, but everyone who’s had a taste would tell you it’s delicious!”
There is also an abnormally large number of sausages in The Porn Table’s menu. “Well, you can’t have a porn themed restaurant without sausage, right? We have all kinds with different shapes and sizes.” Dinah happily bites into one as she finishes that statement.
To complete the genuine porn experience, the chairs and tables are customized to have that casting room feel. There are even vibrating chairs for the ladies. Spurts believes that the restaurant would be a big hit. “This is the one place where anyone can come over, have a nice meal, and just be themselves. There are no judgments, and we don’t discriminate in The Porn Table. Everyone over 18 is welcome to enjoy fine food and an unforgettable experience. I encourage everyone to drop by and have a taste of my wife’s hairy meat pie. It’s one of our specials.”
